I don't know why I'm posting this. I don't really care about much of anything anymore. Living seems completely pointless these days. I don't have a phone, so calling a suicide hotline isn't possible. I probably wouldn't call anyway. I don't want to kill myself, but I can. I'm truly tired of living. So tired I just want to fade away. It sounds clich'e, but who cares. My dads a former gang member who's (ironically) in prison right now, for whatever reason. My mom has severe HS, and she has her own mental issues to deal with. I have 3 sisters, but they're all in a whole different world. I've talked to them, they don't understand or believe what I think about. I failed high school because I didn't try. I have a job, but I don't get payed enough. I don't have any friends at all. I've never really gotten close to any girls, and all the guys I knew are now gangsters, drug dealers, in jail, or dead. I'm thinking about becoming a vigilante. It's not considered suicide if I die helping people right? I probably could make money as a criminal, but thinking about that stuff makes me sick. I'm not trying to plea for help or anything. I doubt anyone on this site can help me. I'll possibly end my life somehow, when it becomes too much (and it will, I know it will). I would get help but it would cost too much. My car is trashed, my house is in foreclosure. I feel so empty, everyday. I know that life is difficult period, but I don't know if I want to try anymore. I don't if I'm going crazy or not. I used to get angry a lot when I was in middle school. High school was just one big lonely, and depressing blur. Most people don't care, and those who do don't understand. I know my death will cause others pain, but eventually it won't matter. The people who would be hurt by my death will get over it in 5-10 years. I'll just be another name on a headstone somewhere. Before I do anything "permanent" I want to talk a little. So reply to this or pm me. It can be about anything, or everything.