I know im hated.

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by vbuk, Apr 14, 2008.

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  1. vbuk

    vbuk Staff Alumni

    I know what everyone thinks of me. Really thinks. I know im hated. I know im a worthless piece of shit. I know all that. Im just sorry i never did any good. Was never good enough. Im sorry to everyone. Hope you can all move on without me moaning on with my shit. Take care
  2. Beret

    Beret Staff Alumni

    Hun :hug: noone thinks that of you, youre a wonderful person :hug:
    Please try to believe in yourself, we all love you,
    Beret xxx
  3. Sa Palomera

    Sa Palomera Well-Known Member

    Clare :hug:

    I don't think anyone hates you :happyno: I for one think you're a lovely person. We may in touch less than we were, I highly doubt you've changed from a lovely person to a 'worthless piece of shit' as you call it, in the last months.
    So conclusion: you are a lovely person and not a piece of shit, and you are not 'not good enough'. In fact you've helped a lot of people on here, I'm sure of that.

  4. smackh2o

    smackh2o SF Supporter

    I said it would get worse Claire :(
    I've been reading your posts lately but I really just didn't know what else I could say to you. If i'm right in thinking, you are really cracking up now and it's getting so hard it's untrue. One day you feel terrible, the next hollow, then maybe strangely nonchalant, then worse. Everything seems very very bad. You can't find anything to help and you feel so alone. You don't want to do things but you feel like you can't really do anything else.
    Am I right?
    I know it's beyond doctors for you I think. I was far too scared as well, or something else, whatever, the point is there is still something you can do.
    You need to write it down, what has happened, why you feel the way you do. But write it with no intention of showing it to anyone. It's your map of the things you've been through. Even a little summary of stuff. And when you're done, save it or envelope it or something and put it away.
    I'm not gonig to tell you exactly why but i'm crossing my fingers it will help when you need it the very most.

    Sorry if I sounded condecending in this Claire. I just recognise it all in what I went through and i'm just hoping now I can give you some real help.
  5. Abacus21

    Abacus21 Staff Alumni

    I think Pete has the right idea hun - writing things down would be a great help :hug:

    You said you felt that you couldn't go on last night, and you're still here now, admittedly feeling the same thing, but what it shows is that we all have an inherant desire to keep on living, even when our mind and body is screaming at us that we need to die. You're still here, not because you're ''a coward'' or whatever for not completing the act, but because deep down you still want to live, I think ... I think most people do when they're feeling suicidal.. Grasp that idea, and hang on for dear life, because this can be gotten through, and you can come out the other side of it, with our help and support from your sister too..
    Things can, and will get better, and you will be able to live and tell that tale. :hug:

    Re: you "knowing" you're hated. Your mind tells you you're hated, but what your mind is telling you, and what is reality, actually can get mixed up along the way. What this thread is showing you is that you aren't hated, and that people do care for you. I know I do. Depression has a funny way of distorting things - and not always the right things either - as I say, as this thread shows, you're not hated, far from it. :hug:
  6. pit

    pit Well-Known Member

    I can totally relate to your post. Everyone hates me, too. And even my friends are indifferent these days. This doesn't include the people on this board, only the ones in real life. Oh well. I am my own best friend.
  7. Angelo_91

    Angelo_91 Well-Known Member

    it really makes you see who your real friends are.
  8. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Clare you are among friends here. We care about what you are feeling and want to help. We will be here at the worst and at the best. You can count on that hun. Your depression is trying to lure you deeper down to where it can control your thoughts and feelings. Dont let it happen. Let us help you fight it by proving you have real friends here hun.
  9. shazzer

    shazzer Well-Known Member

    I've not really spoken to you before but I can tell by the responses to this thread how many people here care about you and want to help you through this. You are not hated hun that is the depression talking people do care myself included even though I don't know you. Please look after yourself and stay with us and stay safe
  10. Shadowlands

    Shadowlands Official SF Hugger Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    You are not hated, Clare! Lots of people here care about you! :hug:
  11. vbuk

    vbuk Staff Alumni

    Its not just the depression tho. She is turning everyone against me. I was left totally alone yesterday. Not even my boss barely spoke to me. He was one of my closest friends but she is turning him against me. Just like when i was a kid. Today its me him and her. Dont want to go. I think im being bullied. But she is so good at it. Nobody notices.
  12. ~CazzaAngel~

    ~CazzaAngel~ Staff Alumni

    I doubt anyone hates you, I mean, who could hate you? You are a wonderful person, you just have problems, we can understand that, please don't do anything hun, you are not a bad person, sometimes our problems make us feel and think bad things about ourselves that just aren't true. Please try to hang in there, I'm here if you need to talk. Take care. :hug:
  13. Gunner12

    Gunner12 Well-Known Member

    It's a bad feeling,

    But there will always be people who love you.

    I know this will be hard, but try to confront her. Tell other people that the bad things she says about you are lies.
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