I know it's going to happen, I just don't know when...

So I've been feeling this way a little while now. Like I've reached a dead end and I'm just sitting here doing nothing. I'm doing therapy, I'm taking my meds, I'm getting ECT done...but nothing is really doing anything.

I may even have a reasonable chance to transition and live as a woman like I've always dreamed of. But I still want to die very badly.

I don't have a plan or anything but I just know that that's how I'm going to die. I can't think of a scenario where my depression doesn't end up winning.

Anyways, since I'm trans people see me as a freak and would rather see me dead than happy...

 

Although I'm not a transsexual, I empathize on trying treatment after treatment with nothing working. I know hopelessness, and it makes me want to die to stop the pain. Life is painful, and it annoys me when people argue with me about that.

Intolerance is a motherfucker. I definitely don't advocate for it, and I hope you get what you want.

 

sending a big hug, if okay. my best friend is trans. he has found much love and acceptance in his life, even from his conservative parents. please hang on. things may be different once you transition. give it a chance.