I strive to find what makes each person around me special... if I think someone is attractive, I let them know. I tell them they are beautiful. I listen to them if they are feeling down and hide my own sadness and offer anything I can to make it easier for them... I genuinely just want people to be happy. But the reason I do this isn't because I'm just a good person... it's because I know what it's like to never be complimented. I know what it's like to be completely fucked up and worthless. I know how it feels to never be loved, to have terrible incurable health problems, to be a drug addict, to be in extreme physical and emotional pain and all I want is for other people not to feel this way. I wouldn't wish it on anyone. I wish loving others was enough to be loved, but it isn't. It really isn't. I know this... but I can't accept it because it's too painful.