I still feel so terribly alone. I watch other people go home to their family. I watch them laugh with each other. I watch them joke around. Hug. I watch them love each other. My mother has my father. My sister has her bf. Everyone has someone and I.. well I don't. I generally don't like people. I hate having to talk to people, or form some sort of connection. I hate having to cater to their needs and to watch my mouth in case I accidentally say something rude. My parents never hugged me, kissed me, nor showed me anything, but a beer in their hand and a slap across my face. I assume that's why I'm awkward around people, especially when they're emotional. I don't know how to be like everyone else. That's also probably one of the many reasons why I can't find anyone, but while I'm laying down by myself, I can't help to feel so sad. That while everyone is cuddling, or laughing with their loved one, I'm here all alone. I don't have anyone to laugh with me, or hug me. I mean I don't like people touching me, because it makes me uncomfortable, but I like the idea of it. I just hate feeling so alone. Makes me feel like nobody cares about me. As if I'm unimportant and that it wouldn't matter if I was gone. I just really feel like crying that's all.