Hi, This is my first time posting here. I lost my childhood best friend six years ago to a car accident. We were best friends since fifth grade, and he died my senior year. He was a good person, and I miss him terribly. I remember how pale he looked in his coffin, and how hard his skin felt when I went down to kiss him. I remember how heavy his coffin was, and I was so small then. fuck. I went away to college and had a substance abuse problem. My roommate at school passed away from a heroin overdose. I dropped out of school. It's been a long time now, and the pain left for a couple years. However, now, I can't help but think of my friends, and how joyless my new relationships are in comparison. I miss my friend. I often spend my days imaging what our lives would have been like. It's just so hard, and I feel so lonely right now.