I'd better just state that their not actually dead, although I have lost them. We were best friends and we also had something, although it wasn't a proper relationship.I know I loved her and that she loved me.I am a bi girl and so was she. I fell in love with her two years ago and we did things and we were practically together but then one day something happened to separate us.I'm going to cut the story short and stick to the basics, although there is a lot more important information. We both had problems with depression and one day me and her and some others went into town and got drunk. I later found out that night that she had gone to hospital and I thought it was for alcohol poisoning.I heard that her mum was blaming me and she just stopped talking to me.I was so worried and upset for her and it was only 3 months later when I found out she'd actually slit her wrists instead and her mum was blaming me.I also heard that her mum had managed to convince her that it was my fault(her mum was a complete control freak).I tried for 8 months to get us to be just friends and finally we became friends again(after a very long and painful time). We were friends for about 3 months but everytime we met it felt like there was this big gap between us because of what had happened.I knew she was still hurting from it but she never dared speak about it.On the other hand, I was hurting really badly from it and I needed to talk to her about it.So I texted her asking if we could talk about something. I didnt say what it was but she didnt reply.I texted her a couple more times and she stopped speaking to me, although all I said was could we talk. We still havnt spoken and I just dont know what to say or do.It was her birthday today andit really messed me up.I need to talk to her and I still love her. Last time we spoke, I could tell there was still something between us, but I dont know how to sort it out. This is the basics of the story, a lot more has happened in the past.I was just wondering if anyone had any tips on what to do.She hasnt blocked me on msn, but Im not sure if its a good idea to talk to her on there? What should i do?I still love her.