Ever since I left, my heart has broken a thousand times. I haven't seen her in so long...but I have... She's always here with me, haunting me, whispering to me, comforting me... But it's just a manifestation of my heart's desire. To live, to love, and to be with her. It was supposed to be forever, not two years...that's no time at all. Ever since, time has changed for me. No longer does it pass by me in a lazy river of halcyon memories. It crashes around me. It beats me down, takes my breath, and basks in my unending pain. Why did things have to be like this? Now, half a country separates us and only half my heart beats. I can never have her again... She is but a ghost to me now, an unattainable need. I have nothing now. No worldly possessions, no spiritual guidance, no real reason to live. Except for hope. As a solitary tear falls on her picture, I know that she will be happy one day, at least. She will find someone ten times better than me, someone who she doesn't have to go to sleep wondering if she'll wake up and find him dead. Someone who doesn't bear the self inflicted scars of a hideous and destructive addiction. As the clouds move past me like shadowed wraiths, I wonder...can I...will I...should I move on? My heart will forever belong to her.