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**I Love You And Always Will**

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So ermmmmm....i've been having a rough time lately, well i think i can handle it but others don't seem to think so. My heads been kinda other the place, dealing with going to get an 'assessment' stuggling with stopping with self harm and then college.

Had a meeting with my mum and step dad with 2 of my teachers.
Kinda got pissed at one of them, the teacher i trusted and have told about my self harm, the one who wanted to call me mum and tell herk, well duting the meeting she said 'we just want you to be safe and to stop hurting yourself' i just knew what she was trying to do, she knows full well that my mum doesn't know about the self harming. I'm an adult if i wanted to tell them i would, why try force me to do it!? I'm not going to! don't you understand that? My mums just started having counselling sessions herself! how can i turn around and sat i've been harming myself for months under her roof and she had no clue! you dont know my mum, it would kill her, i know it would, so please just drop that subject!

So i've been sitting here for the past few hours feeling pretty down, having the urge again (seems to be a constant thing in my life right now) been asleep most of the day trying to block it out and becase im so damn tired.

So i started writting down something and it came out as this.....

I love you and always will​
Every day I feel hurt and pain
Feeling that over and over again
Loving you because you’re so true
But hurting because I can’t be with you

Knowing your hurting so bad
Knowing I can’t be there makes me so sad
All I want to do is reach out my hand
Help you rebuild and survive strand by strand

Lay out my hands and cradle you in my palms
Let you fall asleep while lying in my arms
Making you feel like nothing can defeat you
The love I feel for you is so true

Would put myself thru intense pain
In order to make you feel happy again
Pull out my heart bit by bit
You need it and I can live without it

You mean the world to me
You can be whatever you wish to be
I wish you to survive this day
And I hope that you never again feel this way

You make everything in my world stand still
I love you and always will
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