I made a promise to someone

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by DarnTired, Apr 12, 2008.

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  1. DarnTired

    DarnTired Antiquitie's Friend

    I like to drink and it is a problem of mine. Recently, I've been trying to cut back on it because I was horrified at how much weight I'd put on recently. Today, I was talking with a co-worker, one that I'm friendly with, about my problem with weight. She said she was having a problem too and said that she had to stop drinking wine because, whenever she did, she wound up eating things around the house like icecream and cookies. She said that she'd read somewhere that if you do something (or don't do something) for 20 days straight, it becomes ingrained in you, like a habit. She then sent me an email saying that, as an experiment, she would stop drinking wine and eating icecream and cookies for 20 days. I looked at that email for a while and decided I would give it a go. So I emailed her back and told her I was going to stop drinking alcohol and eating "big meals" (with lots of meats and potatoes, like'd you get in sports bars) for 20 days. I said that knowing that I was looking forward to having a few drinks tonight (it being Friday). It is now past 10 on Friday night and I've had 3 cups of tea, 1 glass of water, a soy-bacon sandwich and no booze or fries yet. I like this person, respect her opinion, and I'd like to keep my promise.

    This may be a tough weekend so wish me luck.
  2. I think you're doing great...it can help to have someone to "do things" with. Unfortunately, I could never fess up to how much I drank to my friends! And of course, none of them had any bad habits :wink:

    I do wish you luck! :smile:
    (though "incentive" is better...)
  3. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I think you can do this, just do it one minute, one hour, one day at a time! Keep us posted on your progress. I care!:smile::hug:
  4. DarnTired

    DarnTired Antiquitie's Friend

    Wow, I got through the weekend and the last couple of days.

    And along with eating fruits and salads... I've dropped 13 pounds!

    Before you say, "That may not be healthy", being 250 pounds wasn't healthy either. It's probably an initial effect of not eating and drinking everything I see (you know, water weight).

    You want to hear the punchline? The woman who started me on this by saying she wasn't going to drink wine or eat cookies and icecream for 20 days forgot on Saturday and ate cookies! She had to start over again! Oh well, I'm encouraging her and she'll make it.

    Feeling okay. Think I'll have a cup of tea.
  5. Esmeralda

    Esmeralda Well-Known Member

    Holy crap, 13 lbs! Good for you! Keep it up!
  6. DarnTired

    DarnTired Antiquitie's Friend

    Feeling lonely tonight. Was kind of a lonely day too. Went to the Getty Center museum. Big place! It was good for a while. Lots of paintings. But after I got inundated with art, it stopped affecting me. Then I looked around, noticed that everyone was with somebody else, and I decided to go home. Stopped off at the record shop to get some rare comedy albums. That was good. But now it's past ten and I feel lonely.

    It's times like these when I usually reach for the bottle. I'm not going to tonight: it's too late to go out and far too cold. I'll take a shower, fool around on the computer a bit more and then go to bed.

    I thought going on the wagon would leave me with sharp and intense cravings. Instead, I've had these low-level desires to go out to the pub and have a couple and talk to the friendly bartenders. They're pretty easy to shake off most of the time. But when I'm lonely, I shake it off and I'm left with a great sadness, as if to say, "There's something I can't have, along with everything else in the world that might make me feel good."

    I don't think I'll be on the wagon forever. I don't particularly want to. But I did want to break the cycle that I had been in before (drinking nearly every day). I want to lose some weight and get a bit more healthy as I approach my forties. And I wanted to show myself that I can go without for an extended period. I can, but when the loneliness hits, it does make me all the sadder and lonelier.

    I'll be fine when I wake up tomorrow. Right now... well...
  7. I think it's great, you posting these updates - your thoughts and feelings, good & bad...You really are doing wonderful!! Truly, inspite of those 'down' moments (and feeling "deprived"). I really liked that you went and got yourself some comedy!! :biggrin: Not everyone would think to do that for themselves... (I, myself - sober over 6 months, "indulge" in Googling anything and everything funny! There is SO much out there - old and new- also now "addicted" to Youtube!!)

    You also sound rather realistic in your goals and expectations, which is another boon. I even detected a hint of glee when you mentioned your friend fell off their own wagon - not because they "failed", but because you haven't 'tripped' yet...needn't gloat, but it's also good you can share each other's foibles with one another...

    You're doing awesome!! :biggrin:
  8. DarnTired

    DarnTired Antiquitie's Friend

    Yeah, and since it was only a cookie wagon that she fell off, we both decided not to take it too seriously.

    Hey, I like that "handle/broke" quote in your personality page (or whatever it's called). Did you make that up? Haven't heard that one yet.
  9. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    :laugh: "cookie wagon", hee hee hee!:laugh:
  10. You BOTH are doing great!! :biggrin: (laughing and forgiving each other/ourselves are gud too!)

    um, nope - can't take credit for that quote...came from a list of silly/funny bumperstickers I found years ago...described me to a "T" for my bio :wink:

    (Google Funny Bumper Stickers - or look for the long-buried thread in the Coffee House) :smile:
  11. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Your doing well, keep up the good work and keep going at your own pace.
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