I miss her so much

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by WhyMeWhy, Nov 15, 2007.

  1. WhyMeWhy

    WhyMeWhy Well-Known Member

    My grandma passed on a year or so ago at 70 yrs. old. I remember all the happy times.... and I cry. Who wouldn't miss their grandma? But we had so many fun times, I wanted it never to end. There was even a "wake" held for her after her passing. While all of the family/freinds were painting flower pots in her honor..... I hid in the bathroom downing sleeping pills. I was heart-broken-they could all tell. I didn't join in the "fun" of painting the flower pots. I'm a wreck, emotionaly. I can't even think of her w/ out crying.....:sad: She was too good to me. I had the most fun spending time with her.... it toomk so little to make her happy. I once brought her a basket full of candy for easter. She was positively glowing at the gift, I made her so happy, & her very presence/attitude did the same for me. And now she's gone. She joined a mormon church and got us(her family) so much food from them. She was always a pleasure to be around. Her final wish was to be creamated and have her ashes spread over the ocean, so she could be one with nature. Very sweet thought..... but I can't even visit her gravesite-there is none. God help me stay alive, I want to go after her. Without her life is worse for me. She was like an oasis in a desert of unhappiness.
  2. *dilligaf*

    *dilligaf* Staff Alumni

    I know EXACTLY how you feel. I have spent 5 months feeling exactly the same, thinking exatly the same thing. But remember one thing, your Grandma loved you, and always tried to make you happy. The last thing she would want is for you to give up your live because she has passed away. As horrible as it sounds she had lived her life....you need to do the same. Saying this, don't rush yourself, give yourslef time to grieve. If you would like to talk about this you can always PM me.