Recently i haven't bn havin urge 2 harm myself! alright on the surface its all good, pat on the back, well done! but the thing is i've bn havin thoughts i shouldnt have, bad 1's (not suicidal 1s in this case). but b4 i would have hurt myself 4 things not as bad. and now i want 2 hurt myself, but i dont have the urges, so i force myself 2 do it! i know it sounds bad, but i should do it 4 the thoughts in my head! i'm not schizophrenic or anything. i still wish i wasn't here, but even thts not as often. i'm so confused! b4 i did it but didnt want 2, now i dont do it but want/ need 2! i just had 2 get it out, any advice?