my dad so much, i need you. why aren't you here? why did you have to leave us all, it hurts so much. why did you chose alcohol over your family? please don't tell me you couldn't help it. i just want a hug from my dad, i don't want anyone else. i miss you so much you have no idea, i just feel so alone, you were the only person who understood what it felt like not to want to be here anymore, i'm so much like you, but i'm terrified of ending up like you. i love you, but you're slowly killing yourself and it's got to the point where i've stopped believing you'll ever get better and am just waiting for the call that there was nothing more they could do. there's so much i still need to say to you, like i'm sorry for being such a nightmare, i'm sorry for all the times i shouted at you, i'm sorry for not being the daughter i could have been, but you didn't care you just wanted me to be happy, but i can't be happy until i know you are, i want my dad back, i want my best friend back. why is it so much to ask.