i understand the fear of change thing, but thats because we are used to how we feel right now....we may not understand it but its who we are at the moment and any change of any nature is scary but to suggest you are scared of getting better is odd because if you didnt want to get better you wouldnt see a therapist surely. i see a therapist to get better, but i dont see myself getting better, which are different and maybe that is what it is with you. i too SH and have a battle with it but to be honest i think you have to be strong to self harm, not weak. all therapists are different and after seeing several psychiatrists in and out of hospital, they all had different opinions so dont be unsettled by what your therapist said. i am seeing a good psychologist now and even tho for the most part i dont hear him, i feel he gets what i have been trying to say for the last 18 months. maybe change therapist if you can, but dont take everything as gospel if you dont feel comfortable with it, as it just feeds your feelings. :hugtackles: