I need help

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Anonymous03, Feb 25, 2014.

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  1. Anonymous03

    Anonymous03 New Member

    This is my first post, i don't know how to start... I've been depressed for quite some time now, my first serious suicidal thought was about a year ago, I remember thinking how worthless and unloveable i am, i've felt this way for so long i forgot when it started, sometime in highschool i think, i just didn't feel like i could fit in.Everytime i fall in love it's horrible, i usually don't have the courage to speak up and the girl just ends up with somebody else, a year and a half ago she ended up with one of my friends, it was just unbearable, but i managed to pull through somehow, mostly because she moved to another country.This year i met this girl, she was the first one that i had the courage to tell her how i felt, she kissed me and i thought that finaly after all the pain and misery i've been through i would get soething in return, but of course i was wrong.Eventualy she said that she couldn't be with me because she needs time after her last break up.It's been half a year now i still talk to her almost on a daily basis and went out a couple of times, but she dosen't want to give me a chance. Sometimes i just get used to the idea that i will never be loved and it feels weirdly comforting, but it dosen't last for very long, i just wanted to know how it feels to be loved or even liked by the other person, and just wanted to share my life with someone, someone that makes me feel strong... but i don't think i will ever know that, i feel hopeless.
    i'm sorry for the big wall of text, i don't know what else to do...
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    If the right person comes along it will happen ok try not to push it to happen She has been through something to so i s being careful take it slow and if it is meant to be it will be if not then you move on ok you look for the right one
  3. youRprecious!

    youRprecious! Antiquities Friend

    To be loved or even liked by another person, first of all we have to be at peace with ourselves and this will be noticed by those we come in contact with, and is very attractive. It is almost magnetic. Try not to make the mistake of thinking that ONLY when you have a girlfriend will things become right, because, as you've experienced, there is no guarantee, and it's often the reverse. Please don't conclude that there's "something wrong with me", because there is not, we are all only human beings Anon03, and all vulnerable when it comes to the love influences in our lives. To be at peace with yourself, first of all, fall in love with that idea - of being at peace with yourself, it's a great foundation on which to build, and then things will start to look up for you, because confidence will increase as you realise more and more that you already are, and have the power to become more so, someone wonderful :)
  4. Anonymous03

    Anonymous03 New Member

    Thank you for the kind words,i'm sorry it took me so long to reply,i just didn't know what to say... i still don't. I'll try to hold on even though i feel like i don't have a reason to do so.
  5. Kabukicho

    Kabukicho Member

    I feel your pain. I've been dumped, cheated on, and manipulated more times than I can count. (Okay, I can count them. And do so on a regular basis.)

    The point is that relationships are very tricky. They're like a drug. The highs are higher but the lows are lower. It will always be like that and I don't think there's anything you can do to change it. You can't control other people's actions (as you've clearly experienced). Relationships are, emotionally, VERY dangerous territory and aren't necessarily going to make you any happier than being single.

    I need year-long periods of being single to recover from relationship break-ups. It's that bad for me. One time, after a particularly bad break-up, I couldn't have an erection for six months. I engaged in some very self-destructive behavior.

    But time went by, and I healed. That's the best advice I can give to you--trite as it is. Time heals. Time heals.
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