I need help...

[Passion]

okay,
to start off,
I have dissociative identity disorder. or multiple personality disorder (though I hate calling it that) for those of you that dont know the other term.
I have heard that if you really work on yourself that your personalities can merge back together...
and well...
I think I have merged back together,
but I think its sort of chaotic,
like theres so many different things shoved into one small space instead of seperated like they used to be...i'm not sure how to explain it...

I havent had a black out in about 3 months now...
is my DID just resting and going to come out of nowhere again?
or am I cured?
whats going on?
I feel like one person again.
and I honestly dont like it, im not used to it.

its creating substance abuse problems, I think.
I mean, I always knew I had a problem with alcohol, well, part of me did.
I like to call her alex....
and well,
recently, ive been drinking and partying, and before that, I really wasnt a party person...or i was...but i wasnt....why is this so difficult to explain?
someone please help me understand what is happening to me.

 

[A Box of Chocolates]

Maybe your other "state of mind" took care of those things subconsciously. And now that you have to deal with it all your confused on how to manage the load. I would try to take all the stuff slowly and try not to maintain all the things alex did. Just chill :p plus drink at parties but dont get blasted because then it puts you at a happy and social mood without all the blackouts or making yourself stupid or addicted.

 

[ggg456]

maybe there are reasons why alex is coming out now.

have you tried talking to her about it?

 

[Passion]

no, alex isnt coming out. shes like, merged back into me... i cant talk to her about it because shes not separate anymore..