I need some drug

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by DarkenedSkies, Sep 13, 2016.

  1. DarkenedSkies

    DarkenedSkies New Member

    I really need something to get me high. Heroin, cocaine, weed, Percocet, it doesn't matter. As long as it's in my system I'll be good. I did heroin 3 days ago. My depression has been getting pretty bad, and it was bad before I did heroin for the first time. I truly cannot stand looking at myself in the mirror because I hate the way I look. I want to break that mirror into pieces, just so I don't have to look at myself. I have so much hatred for myself it makes me sick.
     
  2. Dikta

    Dikta Autistic.

    Sorry to hear that.
    I too hate the way I look.
    But drugs aren't the answer, so I really hope you'll seek professional help.
    Both for the way you feel towards yourself and drugs.

    I'm not quite sure what the drug help is called, but you can find some group that'll help you get through it.
     
  3. Hatred for yourself ? Mind explaining in more detail why?
     
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Hi there, why do you hate your appearance so much? As they say...beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Drugs are not the answer and I know you know that so take a step and reach out for professional help and assistance, talk to us more about why you have so much self hatred for yourself and hopefully things will begin looking up. Do you have friends or family for support? I wish you the best. You deserve to feel good about yourself, sober.
     
  5. Kenny___s

    Kenny___s Member

    I know exactly what you mean and I can't tell you what will fix it but you can't keep doing the hard drugs. that makes it better until they wear off and sometimes not even that long. after that it's even worse then it was before because you have yet another thing on your plate (coming down) and then the process usually just repeats itself. You just have to stop it in its tracks because the drugs will kill you inside and leave you a shell emptier than you knew possible. They'll keep you walking (maybe) but you'll be in more pain mentally than ever before I promise you. I got torn to pieces and thought life could never be worse and then I picked up a rose pipe and my life got so much worse so fast. The drugs probably go hand in hand with the hatred if you're at all like me, and neither will go away quickly but the first step is just telling yourself "I matter" and "I can live without the drugs" and whether or not you believe it you have to keep saying it. over and over, every single day, until you do believe it. Keep your head up above all else, literally and figuratively. Whether it's real or not people will notice your confidence and then you can begin surrounding yourself with positive people who can give you the love that you need. Just remember that people care about you I don't even know you but I care about you. if you ever need to talk hmu I'll get back to you fairly quickly
     
  6. PrettygyalJ

    PrettygyalJ H.O.P.E...hold on, pain ends.

    Hey I know how you feel, if you decide to continue to do drugs please stick to weed. The rest of that stuff will just make things worse, mess up your skin, and be fatal if you accidentally overdose. For me smoking marijuana after a long day makes life a little easier to deal with. If you hate the way you look change it love, I changed what I didn't like and I'm glad I did. Because it boosted my self esteem, if it's something you can't change then embrace it. Don't have self hatred for yourself because in the end you're all that you have in this world. Practice self love and love yourself because it's only one you, Hope things get better for you and God bless.
     
  7. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Actually its a feelgood bandaid that's only temporary. Its not getting you anywhere in life it really is just you escaping from yourself. That stuff I know what you're talking about but I'm telling you its just a substance that's sucking you dry for a short trip. Worth the price for that short of a time? Not think so but hey when you're ready to get that off your back you need to ask for help to the right people. Only yourself can do it and still find a way not to hate yourself with that fake stuff
     
  8. Gabor

    Gabor Member

    i don't like myself at all, i dont purpose, reason to be here but i find hope in all people here that try to help, maybe its going to be better some day, if we have hope, its hard to imagine how but i dont know, shitty life cant continue forever
     
  9. Yoyogirl86

    Yoyogirl86 Well-Known Member

    It might seem odd but have you tried idoser, you get a nice feeling of smoking something but without the nasty side affects? Simply download the tracks from itunes/spotify find yourself a dark room free from daily life distractions, mute all notifications and wear a good pair of headphones and let the affects wash over you. It's perfectly legal and go way to get the same feeling.
     
    Petal likes this.