I really need something to get me high. Heroin, cocaine, weed, Percocet, it doesn't matter. As long as it's in my system I'll be good. I did heroin 3 days ago. My depression has been getting pretty bad, and it was bad before I did heroin for the first time. I truly cannot stand looking at myself in the mirror because I hate the way I look. I want to break that mirror into pieces, just so I don't have to look at myself. I have so much hatred for myself it makes me sick.