Hey everyone....I'm new on here... I'm a 22 year old girl.... I feel like my life is falling apart...I'm supposed to start going to the university...but I'm not sure that's gonna happen..cause I'm too depressed to really look into stuff in regards to choosing classes and stuff..I don't have a job,cause I can't deal with new situations...bosses...or anything pretty much...I feel like I can't do it..can't work!!!It sounds so stupid to "normal" people...they don't understand me... My boyfriend and I broke up 6 days ago..I broke up with him cause he was really cold,didn't give me the attention I needed (my friends pushed me to do it!).., a few hours after I broke up with him I wanted to get back together..I even begged him!..I've been begging ever since...but he says he's not sure...(and I know pressing him into getting back togeher isn't gonna make him want to do it..but i love him so much!!) for a long time i've been feeling like he's the only reason I have to live..cause i hate my life...i dont even think I have a life....I've been thinking about death a lot lately..even though I know I'm too scared to actually do it..kill myself...but I want to be dead.not have to deal with not having anything to live for... I have an eating disorder..i havent been diagnozed..but i'm obssesed with watching what i eat...not wanting to get fat...I'm really thin...not deadly thin..but really thin..I know that..but i still can't give up on my obssesion!..a week ago ,the day before my bf and I broke up I had a binge attack and right after I started crying cause I felt like i'll get so fat from eatting that much!!... When i was younger I even delt with OCD..still do..(havent been diagnozed with that either..but my friend has..and i've dealth with some ot the same things she has...) I just feel like I have so many problems and no way to deal with them..Im to scared to go see a psychologist.. Sorry for writing so much and beening so unclear in my writing! if you read everything and decide to try to help- I really do thank you so much!!