I'm feeling pretty low this evening. My boyfriend keeps telling me to tell him when I'm feeling low and I texted him about 30 mins ago telling him I feel like killing myself and he replied saying, "You bloody ain't. What about me? I need you, I really do. I love you". It's heartbreaking, and I feel like such a heartless bitch for even feeling this way. I don't want to hurt him, I don't want to hurt anyone and it rips me in two when I feel like ending my life. I love him so much, and I care about other people, it's him and other people who are keeping me here and sometimes I wish so badly I can make people hate me.. I WANT people to hate me, turn them against me so that I will be alone and I won't feel guilt. I push people away, some of you on here know only too well I have a tendancy to push people away but you just won't let go and I know I should feel greatful for having friends like you, and a boyfriend like him and I am greatful. It's just sometimes when I'm in a mood like this I wish everyone hated me. I'll be ok, as always. Just feeling pretty meh.