I never did stand a chance.

Discussion in 'Help Me! I Need to Talk to Someone.' started by lost_child, Nov 2, 2010.

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  1. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    I wrote this as a way of asking for help because I struggle to speak (make eye contact), but needed help...still it went unheard the only person who listened & helped has left me on me own abandoned again. I don't know what to do, sorry for posting, i am trying to distract myself but i[m struggling...just counting down the days now until the day.

    Please can someone help me
    i'm destructive in everyway
    from reckless driving
    to self harming

    smoking the dragon
    I've not eaten
    drinking the vodka
    and smoking ganja

    I'm not sleeping,
    keep start weeping
    I'm not motivated
    feeling defeated

    the mind is manic
    everything chaotic
    noises too loud
    don't want to be in a crowd

    darken days
    i'm in a daze
    feeling weak
    can't speak

    seeing animals
    wish it was angels
    hearing voices
    nothing eases

    feeling a failure
    i need some closure
    a lost soul
    not feeling whole

    dead inside
    i have no pride
    need a hand
    to pull me from the quick sand

    need someone close
    to pull me from my lows
    the lows, getting lower
    no sign its going to get better

    need a voice
    to give me a choice
    help me choose
    before I lose.

    Please can someone help me out
    but please don't shout.
  2. IV2010

    IV2010 Well-Known Member

    I know it's probably not much consolation but you still have us and we're here to try to help and support you...
    are you having any proffessional help?
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    your printed words are your voice keep using them okay
    keep writing poetry let out the pain
    i hope you find anther caring soul
    who will help you see you are not alone
    here use your voice here where others will see
    i see i hear you are not invisible not to me.
  4. lost_child

    lost_child Well-Known Member

    i was getting help from 3 key workers and a support worker but i've lost all 4 cause of moving. I'm not with a counsellor as too unstable and nobody wants to help. i'm past the line of help. sorry. I have lost everything, i have nothing. sorry. i have no right to complain, just die just die just die jody just die please just die. please
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    JOdy go to hospital okay they will get you more support workers okay once you are stable call crisis okay talk with a real voice a caring voice okay. we care here we do you are not alone okay. Please reach out to someone there and get help the hospital will keep you safe until you feel better and get you connections to outside help to okay please do that for you
  6. may71

    may71 Well-Known Member

    Going to the hospital sounds like a good idea.

    Can you contact one of your old support workers? They might be able to refer you to new help.

    Please don't hurt yourself and please also don't drive recklessly for everyone's sake. You would probably feel even worse if you knew that you hurt another person.

    It really sounds like you need help from professionals right now, maybe you could call a suicide hotline? That and maybe call the hospital.

  7. Forgotten_Man

    Forgotten_Man Well-Known Member

    Wow, that poem really described my feelings as recently as a month ago. Then I think I broke or something. Anyway, that is besides the point. I found this forum is a great way to get support, as well as ideas.

    One thing that has helped me is identifying one thing, JUST one thing, and working on only that thing. Originally I was trying to accomplish too much. Sometimes you do not have motivation to do things. You have to force yourself to do stuff. Sometimes the movitivation comes later. Try to celebrate the small victories. As they will lead up to big victories.

    :hug: I hope you feel better. :mhmm: I will do what I can to help if you want me too.
  8. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Your poem was really touching Jody, but I could really feel how much pain you are in. I wish there was more that I could do to help, but I will offer my moral support. You are really nice person and I would really like if you can keep on trying to heal. :hug:
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