I push away the ones i care about?

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by Painttheskyred, Mar 23, 2007.

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  1. Painttheskyred

    Painttheskyred Well-Known Member

    Im fed up with , thinking that people are being nasty to me when they aint , i feel as if everyone hates me , even if they are being nice to me , it sucks, if i keep hurting the people i love and care about , my self harm will go more out of control , ive had enough of it, im always on the denfense because ive been hurt so much , and everyone i know has left me high and dry because of it , maybe friends is somthing im just not allowed to have , because i nearly always end up losing them. Sometimes i just wish i could tell myself to think <<< but then i do think it only makes the matter worse and i think more into what the person it saying to me.

    now i will be drinking again tonight and i will be hurting more than ever again because im a fucking twaT!!!!
  2. chasing_dreams

    chasing_dreams Well-Known Member

    I do that all the time. Every time I have a conversation with someone, or someone looks at me, says something or whatever all these things go through my mind about what they think of me, how much they hate me. Deep down I guess i know it's not true, it's just hard to believe that sometimes.

    I feel like I'm pushing away all of my friends because I don't want to let anyone get too close. I'm not even sure if that's it - I need to feel close to someone, but I think I'm just scared that if I start confiding in someone they'll leave, and I'll end up feeling even worse.

    It was nice to meet you in chat the other night. PM me if you ever need to talk :hug:
  3. reborn1961

    reborn1961 Guest

    Sometimes hurt people we care about to protect us. If you are afraid of loving someone you may try and self destruct the relationship to save you some pain. You tell yourself, it would never work anyway so why not cut it short and sabatoge it now. This is pretty common for humans so don't beat yourself up. Eventually you will decide to change that in your life and seek help from therapists or family etc to help you figure out why you do it and how not to do it. Its not easy, especially if depressed as we tend to get a bit paranoid. Don't give up yet if possible.
  4. blade

    blade Well-Known Member

    yeah i tend to do that to. to the ppl u really love: the less they know the better.
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