:sad: I really could use some advice. Thanks to anyone who took the time to view this. I'm 18 years old and I have been suffering from severe depression and generalized anxiety disorder for a number of years. Around Thanksgiving, everything began to worsen with no direct cause. During the Summer of 2008, I was treated at a residential hospital (unlocked unit, more freedom, etc.) for 4 weeks, discharged, and 2 weeks later I was stepped up into an impatient unit for suicide intent. After that I returned to the residential place for another 3 weeks then finally came home. Since that Summer, I have been taking Lamictal to help stabilize my moods. I have not responded well to SSRIs or SSNRIs. (I've tried Prozac twice, Celexa, Seroquel, Lamictal, and Cymbalta.) Because things haven't been going well, there has been a lot of talk about me being admitted to another hospital for a little while and although I know it sucks, I am not completely opposed to it because I feel horrible and just want to get better. I'm on a waiting list so now I just have to get through the next few days on my own but I don't know if I can do it. I've been experiencing Psychomotor agitation and I think I've had my first panic attacks in the past couple of weeks. Tonight things got even worse when my 1-and-a-1/2 year old dog died suddenly. He was playing outside with my dad and then just collapsed and stopped breathing. I didn't have the greatest relationship with him but I'm really hurting. I'm feeling very suicidal now because my dad is crying and I'm not emotionally able to cope with my parents being upset. I know this is ridiculous, but I feel like this is my fault. I sort of believe in fate, and my dad freaked and broke down screaming right away. Considering he is a police officer and I have 3 little brothers, his reaction had a very negative impact. AHHHH! Just thinking about this whole situation killing me. Well, if you actually read through this whole post, I am so appreciative. Does anyone have any ideas to cope with this in the mean time? I am blasting music in attempt to block out my dad's crying, I've played a few computer games, and writing this but I'm not sure what to do next.