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I really don't know!

So so tired

Well-Known Member
#1
I feel overwhelmed by an avalanche of pure raw emotion that hurts me to my core. It suffocates me and I feel unable to breathe.

These emotions are not new and have been with me for a few years but their impact are still unbearable.
I am so tired, I tried but it's too much too late.
I tried, I failed.
I can't have what I want and don't want what I have.
Its not enough!
I am the least important person in this pathetic excuse of a life.
Who was I ever trying to fool, I have been the fool all along.

Anything can trigger me reminding me of so many aspects of a previous happy and full filling life which just leaves me feeling of loss and pain.
I cry until my eyes are raw and cannot see because of the lake of tears that fill my my eyes and over flow as I blink.

My heart is broken and torn, its irreversibly damaged. No medication can help unless it would sedate me 24 /7.
This is more than a a moment but all previous moments put together that represent a package of total hopelessness and despair.

Hope is so important, if you have it, you are so lucky.
If you can smile without it taking everything you have, if you can feel happiness and have dreams - the world could be yours.
Don't throw away what you have or could become. It's too late for me.
I miss myself with all the dreams I used to truly believe were possible but now know are unobtainable.
This is not self pity but the expression of a struggle which is genuine and dibilatating on so many levels.
I really don't know what the answer is anymore.
Thankyou for reading, I wish you well xx
So so tired
 

Angel777

Well-Known Member
#3
Hi , so so tired , I just posted on here , saying preety much the same as you , I have clinical depression and anxiety , and I know your pain very well. I know how tired you are , and I know how diffucult it must be to Speak up and be listened too and understood . in your situation ,you could do with a lot of support, have you Tried MIND, they are a great charity they have free groups, peer support ,for mental illness. They could be a great support , and bring some happiness into your life . You deserve that .it’s all online support at the moment due to the virus .
 

So so tired

Well-Known Member
#6
Hi , so so tired , I just posted on here , saying preety much the same as you , I have clinical depression and anxiety , and I know your pain very well. I know how tired you are , and I know how diffucult it must be to Speak up and be listened too and understood . in your situation ,you could do with a lot of support, have you Tried MIND, they are a great charity they have free groups, peer support ,for mental illness. They could be a great support , and bring some happiness into your life . You deserve that .it’s all online support at the moment due to the virus .
Hi
Thankyou for your suggestion, I've not tried mind support groups. I do find their website helpful for information.
I hope you can find some relief also in these difficult if not impossible times
*brohug
 
#7
I'm sorry you're feeling so bad at the moment @So so tired, I know how difficult it can be. You're not unimportant. You're important and you have worth. I know it may not feel like it know, during all this pain, but things can get better for you, and you can make it through this tough time.

I don't know too much about MIND, but it could be worth a shot. Maybe try and find a phone number to call them and ask them about the support they offer if you can.

Stay safe. Sending hugs *brohug.
 

So so tired

Well-Known Member
#8
I'm sorry you're feeling so bad at the moment @So so tired, I know how difficult it can be. You're not unimportant. You're important and you have worth. I know it may not feel like it know, during all this pain, but things can get better for you, and you can make it through this tough time.

I don't know too much about MIND, but it could be worth a shot. Maybe try and find a phone number to call them and ask them about the support they offer if you can.

Stay safe. Sending hugs *brohug.
Thankyou *hug
 

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