i really need help

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by lilyao, Mar 27, 2007.

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  1. lilyao

    lilyao Active Member

    hey guys!
    weel im new here, im just looking for a way to get rid of the idea of suicide.

    im only 15 years old. i really feel like im just $#!%, i cant live like this anymore, ive felt really really ugly like about 3 years ago, my parents have noticed i dont look myself in the mirror.

    i havent seen myself in the mirror since september 13th 2006. i just cant , now i do my hair as i can , time before people told me i was pretty and many things like that but i never believed that, and now that almost no one says this i just feel like they have been lying all this time.

    im sure its cooler if there's one less ugly person in the world, so maybe the solution is killing myself.
    maybe they wont care about me aymore.
     
  2. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    You know that killing yourself is not the best solution, otherwise you would not have posted asking for help to get rid of what you feel, so that's a good thing.

    I strongly recommend that you go to the doctor about this. He can help you with both the suicidal thoughts, and the warped image you have of yourself. There are lots of things that might help you including meds and/or therapy.

    You mention that your parents have noticed, could you talk to them about how you feel? Do you think they would be supportive?

    If people feel that someone has a problem with something, then often they steer away from talking about it. If someone has anorexia and is really skinny, often people don't comment about it because they are worried how the person might react, but the anorexic person thinks that because no one says how slim they are anymore, they must be fat. But it's not true, and the same applies to you. People probably realised you have a problem with how you look, so they try not to comment on it anymore, it doesn't mean you are not pretty, it means people are worried about you.

    I highly doubt you are, as you put it, 'ugly', but even if you are, so what. It is the person underneath that people want to know. This world we live in focuses on what we look like, but in real life it doesn't matter.

    I am thinking that maybe you have some sort of disorder that warps how you see yourself (I am thinking of a specific one, but I am not going to say because often people subconsciously gain symptoms to fit a diagnosis). This is why I think you need to get yourself to the docs asap. the longer it goes on, the harder it is to deal with, so the sooner you go, the sooner you will start to feel better.

    Hang in there honey, keep fighting and try and get yourself some help.

    Take care
     
  3. Scum

    Scum Well-Known Member

    Oh, and welcome to SF!
     
  4. lilyao

    lilyao Active Member

    thank you so much for your help "scum" (i dont know why you named yourself that way if youre really not scum) , well , im sure my parents would be supportive but i just cant find the way to tell them, i ve heard my mom say theres something wrong with me but she says it like she didt care or maybe shes just trying to make me realize im wrong, im not sure if im ugly or not but thats how i feel anyway, and i i was i think its worst to know you are because we live in a society where physical aspect is really important so i dont know...
     
  5. avenueQ

    avenueQ Member

    hey, i really hope that you can find it in yourself to fight the feeling that you want to die. im sure that you can thing of other things in your life that make it worth living.
    i felt exactly the same way this time last year, (except about my weight more than my appearence) and although i dont know exactly what you are going through i can imagine a bit the torture you must be feeling. but i managed to think of somethings in life that were worth living for until i could get help for it.
    its really worth telling your parents, or a close friend, or a teacher or anyone you feel you could confide in so that you can get some help, i am sure you can get through this.
    feel free to PM me. :)
     
  6. lilboyblue

    lilboyblue Well-Known Member

    lilyao, 's' is right, i cant bring myself to use that screen name sorry. there is a book by david burns - feeling good - it talks about ways to take control of negative thoughts, so if you cant bring yourself to ask for help, go check out the library for that book and read a few pages. keep posting here too, you will find lots of people who are willing to share...
     
  7. lilyao

    lilyao Active Member

    lilboyblue, thank you , ill look 4 that book right away, im not sure if ill be able to tell someone
     
  8. ace

    ace Well-Known Member


    Hi lily sweety your thread struck a cord with me I'LL tell you why,you speak about your image I suffer from bdd Bio dismorphic disorder and obsess badly over my nose and teeth especially.I observe myselg against everyone else so I know how much this hurts.Only people it affects really bad understand what it's like,talk to me about how you feel I understand it all.
     
  9. blade

    blade Well-Known Member

    i dont have to wuote the hole thing its just this bit i really want to proove.
    i agree killing your self is not the best solution. i go through that faze sometimes. and l8er on i think different adn im ok lifes cool adnsomedays i feel like killing my self and soo on. ive tried killing my self4 or 5 times so far and i fail beause i think to my boyfrind and my close pals.

    my bf is the one keeping me alive at the moment.

    girl all i have to say is. "have a little faith" u will pull through this.
     
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