No doubt about it. I suck grievously. I damage everyone I come into contact with. For the past week, I've been thinking about all of the grief I've caused for so many people. I'm not intentionally "mean" or anything, but the way I have existed creates problems for others. I should write down all of the stuff I've been thinking about. If I turned it into a book, it would probably show up on the shelves in the "horror" section. Writing the book would require that I continue to live. I'm not sure I want to do that.