I really want to die, and I think it's totally justified.

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Growing up, I was never suicidal - often depressed, and shy, but I couldn't understand what would make someone want to take their own life. A little over four years ago, my life changed dramatically and negatively. My brain and body were injured by a prescription drug... I am no longer myself, and I know that I will never be the person that I once was -- I will never know the person that I would have become. There is nothing in this world that will make my life worth living, there is only the pain of loss. Suicide for me isn't the easy way out, it's the only way -- there are no solutions in this world to my problems. I was given a normally functioning body and brain, and I messed it up when I was 23 years old... I messed it up with the help of a crooked doctor, and a crooked pharmaceutical company, but I was the one who swallowed those pills. I can't stand the idea that I did this to myself -- that I was stupid enough to fall into this trap. I really don't know why I'm even posting this - it's as if I'm so weak that I'm asking a bunch of anonymous people for permission to commit suicide... I know that the advice that I will receive will be of no help to me, I just want there to be a record of what I am going through so that other people don't end up like me... And, perhaps, some of you will see that at least you have your health (as cheesy as that sounds), so your life may be worth living.
I obviously have no idea what you personally are going thru, and I would be that last person to say that someone doesn not have the right to take their own life, but it sounds like this is someone else's fuck up. Not yours. Whatever drugs these people gave u that fucked u up, it is their mistake, and not yours, even tho u are paying for it. U may bever be the person u would have been if this hadn't happened to u, but u can still be someone, despite what others have put u thru. In spite of them. Where there is life there is hope, hang on to that as long as u can.
I think he/she has undergone a sex change operation thats what i could gues from his/hers post

is that right?

im interested in this. becouse i always felt trapped in my own sex


The biggest loser ever to live.
No no no, its not a sex change at all!
He picked a random ill certified doctor which gave him some very dangerous and unproven medicine that screwed up his nervous system right?
Right, it's not a sex change - although it might as well have been, considering what it has done to me. The doctor outright lied to me about the drug, and i'm fucked for life because he wanted a measly couple hundred more from return visits... I believed him, and now i'm screwed... I really thought I was being safe, did some research on it, and stopped taking it within a few days, but the damage is already done.
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