I screwed up... big time

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by WickedTruth, Apr 14, 2013.

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  1. WickedTruth

    WickedTruth Member

    I relapsed.
    Not just relapsed, but on my arms.
    I am so screwed.
    It's taking control again.
    I don't know how to stop anymore.

    Help? Anyone. Please?
  2. katrina77

    katrina77 Guest

    You need a distraction for right now. Is there anything you find calming, that makes you feel better besides the SH? I don't care if it's a movie, a hobby, a warm bath, anything that can take the place of the SH for right now.

    Are you in counseling? SH isn't the problem, but the feelings that cause you to SH. You need to feel like you have control over your life, and that you are doing things that you enjoy, and sometimes we need help with that.

    Even if you relapsed, it doesn't mean you can't pick yourself up, and start again. Pretty much everyone relapses when they are trying to change things in their life. Forgive yourself, and start again.

    And let us know what you are feeling, we are here to talk.
  3. WickedTruth

    WickedTruth Member

    I usually just write or read something.

    No, I want to be, but I don't know where to go in my city. I already went to my doctor but he didn't do much :(. But I want help.

    It's getting more constant now. First off it was just a relapse every few weeks. Now it's every day, sometimes more than once.

    I just want things to be right for once ya know? I just want to be happy.
  4. katrina77

    katrina77 Guest

    Yeah, I know what you mean. It would be nice just to feel, "okay" again, or feel safe.

    Can you call your doctor and ask for a referral to a therapist? If the cost is a problem, let them know you need a referral to a free or low cost clinic.

    Hang in there. You're not alone.
  5. Butterfly

    Butterfly Resident SF Sims Enthusiast Staff Alumni SF Author SF Supporter

    Relapses do unfortunately happen and although it's horrible when it happens, you should not feel ashamed or disappointed in yourself. The fact that you have realised you have relapsed shows that you are aware of the problem and thinking "right I need some help now". Make sure your doctor hears you so you can get some therapy and talk about why you have been self harming again and find some alternative coping mechanisms. Don't be too hard on yourself, you've beat it once, you can do it again :)
  6. skinnylove911

    skinnylove911 Well-Known Member

    Sorry to hear you've relapsed it happens a lot. what brought on the relapse that you want to tell us about.
  7. WickedTruth

    WickedTruth Member

    Well I live with my boyfriend and his nan because it's closer to university and generally more convenient than my place...
    Anyways, my sister rung me the other night begging me to let her come stay with us when we find a new place.
    My sister's the kind of girl who never complains about anything or asks for anything, so for her to do that was beyond shocking.
    Anyways, the reason I relapsed is because my mum is getting worse mentally. She's been randomly going around to the neighbours in the middle of the night asking for smokes and telling them that my sister, dad and I have been abusing her (which is untrue). She's also been going to church meetings in the community and following people home, then bringing said people into the house.

    My sister (who is only 15) is getting so tired and stressed trying to look after her, and my dad's in denial and refuses to put her in care or get her further help so he's just been drinking a lot.

    I've go uni to worry about, I basically just got fired from work yesterday. I'm trying to battle depression and anxiety. I'm the therapist for all of my friends and I can't just stop being there for them or they will know something is up.
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