I self harm in my sleep. What does it mean?!?

Discussion in 'Self Harm & Substance Abuse' started by why_shouldnt_i_die, Jul 10, 2010.

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  1. why_shouldnt_i_die

    why_shouldnt_i_die Account Closed

    Idk what's wrong with me i've been a self harm addict for about four years now. But i completely stopped at the beginning of this year. I struggled with it for so long but i made it through. And i was doing extremely well. But starting around four months ago i started sleepwalking. apparently id been going into the kitchen at night and grabbing a knife and taking it to bed with me and id wake up beside it. I didn't realize what i was doing at first i just thought id left the knife there when id eat supper in my room. but then around a month later i woke up with it to my leg half way through a cut. Thats when i first started to seriously freak out. i stopped sleeping for three days but after that i passed out and i did it again. then suddenly it just stopped for two months but last week i woke up with the knife again and this morning i cut THREE times before i even woke up! I've looked everywhere on the internet for an explanation but found nothing. I've been able to handle everything by myself this whole time, i love my mother and don't want her to know that i cut because i don't want her blaming herself thats why i tried quit in the first place and i really want to take care of this myself please please help i need some serious advice and an explanation as to what the hell is happening to me.
  2. Madam Mim

    Madam Mim Well-Known Member

    Welcome to the site.

    I find this really interesting, but to be honest, I have no idea what to suggest except to restrict your access to the knives, which may not be possible if you live with your mother. I have limited knowledge about dreams and sleepwalking, but it seems to me that the sleepwalking is just you living out the dream, and we dream about our hopes and fears. So, either you fear cutting, but then end up doing it, or part of you wants to do it.

    Is something worrying or bothering you? Something that would normally trigger you to cut? It might be that you're suppressing it while awake so your mind deals with it the only way it knows how when you're asleep. Just a thought.

    I'm sorry I can't be of more help. I hope that you work this out soon before you do too much damage.

  3. Dave_N

    Dave_N Banned Member

    Hi Katie. I've done some research into sleepwalking and one thing that I have learned is that nearly everything that a person doesn while awake, can be done while asleep (including sleepsex and sleepselfharm). I think you should see a doctor who specializes in sleeping disorders as this is very serious. What if you start stabbing yourself or someone else while asleep? If you're taking any sleep medications, then stop taking them immediately. Ambien CR can cause this to happen. Be safe. :hug:
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