I seriously need help from this Site

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Striickenlol, Jan 2, 2010.

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  1. Striickenlol

    Striickenlol New Member

    Hi my name is Fay (short for my real name) and I am a 18 male. When I was 14 i met this girl over the internet, her name is Rebecca. We became best friends and before I knew it we were in love. for these 4 years it has been so hard on me because she lives in PA and i live in MI =/. Me and her have gone through more than the average couple.

    From her cheating on me when she was young, from her being suicidal also but I was always there for her. all of the problems that we have had I have been there so much to give her my heart and my company and i feel like i did all of that for nothing. a few weeks ago she said she didnt want to be in a serous relationship because she is to young for that. I understand that but it makes me feel as if I did something wrong =/. Nobody has any clue about how much I love this girl.

    She is my everything, She asked me if our relationship could be open and I told her yes but before this she promised me that she would not do anything with a guy until we had sex. A few days ago she went to the movies with her guy friend. 2 days after that she told me that she gave him head at the movies. It tore my heart apart, I walked around my house crying and yelling in rage because she broke the promise that i trusted her with the most. I have no friends, NO family at all. I have my heart for her so bad that losing her will cause me to kill myself. I have so much feeling for her love that I just don't know what to do now.

    She told me that she is still in love with me and that we will be together in the future, but I can't get it out of my mind of her having sex with a guy and its not me. I wanted to be her first because that means a lot to me. and it seems like she does not care about my feelings and continues to hurt me after she says she does not want to.

    I feel like killing myself but I need some help. :lost:
     
  2. innocencexisxlove

    innocencexisxlove Well-Known Member

    :hug: you know.. i know how you feel.

    i currently love someone from online, i'm in MI, he's in CA.. it is tough..
    and that's why we aren't exactly together right now..

    i guess, all i can say is that i'm here if you ever need to talk..
    i can't give much advice, because i am, where you are.. stuck..

    :hug: here if you need me, feel free to PM me
    -Rachel
     
  3. Striickenlol

    Striickenlol New Member

    yeah it sucks =\ I have AIM if you want to talk on that =] My SN is R3load v2
     
  4. jxdama

    jxdama Staff Member Safety & Support

    its a destructive relationship. she doesnt care about you. every second wasted on her is just that, a waste. go on to something better.
     
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