Well, I actually did it. I wrote a letter to my boyfriend explaining my unique and very depressing situation, and at the end told him I'd be waiting for him after he read it to talk about it. I'm hoping that I start feeling better about it soon, that the anxiety will go away after I've had time to really calm down from it. There's nothing more difficult than watching the truth crush someone's heart who's done nothing but love you. For now, we're still "together," and platonic. He says he understands, and that he knows it's not his fault and SAYS he doesn't fault me either...but I know what I see when I look into his eyes, and there's nothing but hurt. I can't decide which feels worse...the misery of living a lie, or the gut-wrenching pain of knowing I stepped on his heart. I didn't think it would be this hard. I pray and I pray and I pray that I did the right thing by telling the truth. Because right now, I feel like complete shit. But...I'll get over it. I think.