But every once in a while when I go back to my hometown. I go into triggering anger and obsessing over past bullying. I don't think my bullyer's realize that I carry anger today for the past 17 years. I would rather not drive back but my father keeps me going back and today I realized that it is becoming a problem. Because I was screaming and waving my hand in the air and passer bys thought I was crazy. I think I might need to goto psycho therapy. Basically, I acted like an idiot. Basically, I feel crappy how I acted. I really wish I would never have to drive back to that piss a crap town. After my parents die, I will never drive back to that piss of crap town. I have maybe one decent plutonic friend in that town. All my real friends live in other cities. I don't think that I'm ready for a girlfriend. Maybe, I should hire an escort LOL.