I struggle to cope with the tragedy of life

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Cosmos Atom, Oct 11, 2010.

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  1. Cosmos Atom

    Cosmos Atom Member

    As a sufferer of Avoidant Personality Disorder I'm much happier sitting on the sidelines and watching life go by. I find watching people more interesting than talking to them if that makes sense.

    The problem is I find the suffering, the wars, the religious hatred, the greed etc of life so tragic and depressing it makes my head want to burst. I accept there's nothing I can do about it but I feel such an alien from the human race and I can't understand why we are so cruel to each other. Is it even worth trying to empathize or should I just switch off and be glad my suffering is less than certain others?

    Ignorance is bliss - how true.
  2. Ringo

    Ringo Well-Known Member

    I'm struggling enough with my own problems never mind worrying about all the other stuff that goes on in the world. No point dwelling on stuff you can't do anything about. Maybe I've got the wrong attitude.
  3. cherry.blossom

    cherry.blossom Well-Known Member

    I struggle with all those things too, it's so sad
    how can humans be so cruel??!!!!!
    sometimes I wish I could ignore all of that... sometimes I can but other times I cant
    and sometimes I wonder if it makes me a better person that I dont ignore it..
    but sometimes I feel stupid by giving those things ''I also feel I cant do nothin about'' so much importance...
    I guess that it should be something balance like that those things get to you
    but they dont paralize you if you have to react..
    it's good that those things matter to you and you dont ignore them..
    just by doing that I feel it makes you a better person and you are helping in some kind of way passin the good thoughts and not lookin to the other side. :)
    Last edited by a moderator: Oct 11, 2010
  4. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    I used to be that way too. Everything was so overwhelming. The tragic state the world seems to need to be in to thrive. And it started at a very young age for me. My parents tell me often about how when I was only 3 or 4 I'd cry and be taken over by uncontrollable fear about the world and it's problems. And question continously the cruelities between people and the world as a whole. I'm now 46. I still am concerned and overwhelmed, but not as much.

    You need to keep prespective. You are but one person on a planet of millions. I'm not saying you are insignificant. Far from it. But when something is occuring on a colossal scale, then the solution needs to be of equal size. Let me explain a little better. You are standing in line at the local restuarant waiting to pay. The mother ahead of you is obviously stressed out with the 3 small ones running and misbehaving around her. She cant seem to find the correct amount of money to pay for the food they have just eaten. You see something in her that smacks too much of you. So.... you walk up and, not offer to, but rather just pay the bill. Now you have just helped another human that albeit a small tragedy compared to the world issues, and you made a difference. You both walk away feeling like there is still a little hope for the world.

    Now you see in the news a country devastated by terrible after effects of some freak of nature storm. You want to help. Is you sending the money to help one mom pay for her kids meal really going to make a change? Nope. But if you join force with all the others that are watching that same news program, change will happen.

    Guess what I'm trying to say is that change can happen. But maybe rather than focussing on the global problems, why not narrow your sites to just your neighborhood? Volunteer at a shelter. Offer to visit some of the elderly in your area that are shut ins. Attend other cultural events to learn more about the people and the world around you. Once you feel secure in doing that then branch out and join forces with organizations that fight for the same things you feel strongly about.

    You will see that with each effort you make, and especially the ones that you see the end result makes a difference in the life of another person, that the world starts to not seem so dire and gloom stricken. And you will find strength in your own abilities too.

    Dont forget, bad news sells. So those stories are blasted all over the front pages of papers, the top story of the night. Stories of hope and happiness never make the front page. They are quietly tucked between the world events and the hockey scores from the night before.

    Sure I still worry about the plight of this planet. But I've also realized that I'm better off to direct my worries to getting others to see and start working on them with me, and on a scale that I can manage, than to sit and worry and get nothing done at all.

    You are one person. So please dont expect so much from yourself. One person makes one change. Many people can make a world of difference!!!!!
  5. Cosmos Atom

    Cosmos Atom Member

    You're right of course and if I wasn't so crippled by low self esteem and anxiety I'm sure I could have done more. Perhaps in another life.

    The best I can do is be decent to other people whenever I have to deal with them. It's not much I guess but better than nothing.
  6. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    I hope I didnt offend you with my reply. It wasnt meant to sound demeaning or hurtful. I still suffer horribly with my fears and worries about mankind. But I dont know, as you age I guess you start to let go of a few things as a survival technique. Or you just get lazier as you age (lol). Hun anything you can contribute is an asset. And if you cant, that's ok too. Just struggling to keep yourself afloat out there is effort enough in making the world a better place to live in. Deny it if you want, but there is atleast one person out there that you make a difference to. You may not even be aware of that person, but they are there. So as you struggle to keep moving forward, you are making the world a better place for that one person. Keep moving hun and when you need someone to lean on for a bit, you got us here at SF :arms:
  7. Cosmos Atom

    Cosmos Atom Member

    No no I wasn't offended in the slightest :)

    Thanks for the kind words.
  8. itmahanh

    itmahanh Senior Member & Antiquities Friend

    Oh and I like the "sidelines" too. I find when I sit and watch people rather than be with people, my mind isnt working so hard worrying about people and the rest of my crap. Drop me a line anytime you like. Or better yet, lets get togther and go people watch at Walmart. Always a great to "forget" things. Geez, Walmart even has it's own website of the pictures of some of the "best" people seen there and the fashion statements they make (lol). Hun just remember.... you're not alone. Keep reaching out!
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