I think I am crazy..or lost...or no control?

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by bean82187, Jul 29, 2011.

  1. bean82187

    bean82187 Member

    Ever have that feeling where you THINK everything about you is set in life. Two business degrees. A GREAT family, merely what seems like a great path headed your way...

    ..But deep inside though, I havn't been happy for about 7 years but I keep denying it. I have a massive void inside that was full of hate for a brief number of those years. Now it's a mix between depression, anxiety, hate, sorrow...negative feelings.

    Started about 7 years ago. Had NO self-esteem in high school. Got bullied. 2 year relationship that ended terribly: girl cheated on me within the time she broke up with me... overseas with HER family.

    Went to college, joined a fraternity and became a reject. much fun. Got rejected by every company for internships. Got a DUI 5 months before graduation.

    My take? God has a sense of humor. What looks like a great foundation is just crumbling one by one. Am I crazy or do someone know where I'm getting at?
     
  2. Speedy

    Speedy Staff Alumni

    Hey Bean!

    I read your other three posts aside from this post, and I was wondering how your therapy appointments have been going? Have you touched on and opened up about the subjects you outlined above?

    Today, I've been thinking about how my family is the only group of people I can trust 100% through everything at this point in my life. You said you have a "GREAT family." Is their foundation of support for you still solid?

    P.S. As far as I know, I think you're sane. ;) I never got to welcome you a month ago, so this post can function as a "Welcome" post too! So Welcome!! (albeit bellated :D)

    Alex
     
  3. Kiba

    Kiba Well-Known Member

    I think I understand.. I seem to have a lot of irony in my own life.. more toward the negative end.. I also know others who seem to have that too.. :( I hope you can get the help you need though. Maybe visit a doctor and ask for a referral to a councilor if you don't have one.. :hug:
     
  4. bean82187

    bean82187 Member

    Hey Alex,

    Not exactly. I've only been to one therapy session and I'm afraid to tell them the details that extend from the roots of those problems because I'm afraid they are gonna label me as a threat to my own life or something. My support for them is still solid but I havn't told them anything and I still wont. Thanks for the warm welcome!

    Dragonblood,

    What are some of the things you're doing to cope with what you and people you know are facing?