I think im done

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Y bother, Feb 26, 2014.

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  1. Y bother

    Y bother Member

    The only thing that has stopped me in the past is my nieces and nephews growing up without their fav uncle, but i dont think that is even enough anymore, i think 12 months of hell is enough!
     
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    Heya, Y bother! What has been happening for 12 months that has you this low? Around if you want to share. In the mean time, stay safe and take care!
     
  3. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    You are their fav uncle for a reason hun you bring them joy and i hope they bring you joy in return for them reach out ok and get some support you need and deserve stay safe ok hugs
     
  4. mark b

    mark b Well-Known Member

    They were your main reason before so they can be again.

    Do let us know why you have any concerns.

    So wish i had some family as you do.
     
  5. Witty_Sarcasm

    Witty_Sarcasm Writer, Musician, Fun Lover, Magic Maker

    I think that's one main reason I'm still here, to get to be in my nephew's life, even though I may never have the chance to do that. What has been going on in your life that is making you feel this way?
     
  6. Cat of Spades

    Cat of Spades Well-Known Member

    I would recommend taking a step back and re-evaluating the situation with a cold head and a better focus.

    When things get hot it is easy to make rash decisions that may not be in our best interest.
     
  7. Y bother

    Y bother Member

    Thx all for your thoughts and help. I have thought about stuff a lot and yes i was having a really bad time when i first posted obviously. But everyday is the same...should i or shouldnt i...just most days lean more towards the "i should" lately.
    i just think Its funny (well not funny but you know) that close friends and family you can't stand to be around coz ever second your judged and put down, even though you have always put all of them ppl before yourself your whole life and still do. But yet a 5 yr old little girl can just say a few words to you and brighten up you day.
    Today i went to see my nieces as i always do when thinking bad thoughts, i was lying on the couch with them watching "the saddle club" (that in itself could bring someone to harm themselves lol) and just when i was thinking in my head life sucks and i should just do it.. A cute 5 yr old rolled over hugged me and said "your the best uncle, i love you". I pretty much had to go to the bathroom and cry like a little girl after saying i love you too cutie with a smile, even though i nearly broke down in tears right then and there and didn't wont the hug to stop. It was very hard, as i was at my sisters house that i don't talk to a lot while I'm there except hi and bye. Anyway so what I'm saying is, today was an ok day.
    I am even in the process of a test... of not calling or making contact with close friends, i have come to realise i dont really have friends, not one person has contacted me this whole yr. i have realised its always me calling or going round to their house to catch up. Not one has put in the effort even just to call and say hi, im sure they all will the second they need something knowing i always drop everything to help...well not this time.

    We will see what tomorrow brings.

    Thanks again all
     
  8. flowers

    flowers Senior Member

    I TOTALLY hear what you mean about children. You and they are so lucky to have each other. Glad you joined this community. I think its great. People come here to say things they cannot say irl. Or perhaps elsewhere even online. And for many, including moi, it helps.

    Sorry re your friends. I have had my share of people who just call or reach out when they need something. Or want help. That is partially because of me though. I do not feel very deserving unless I am giving. So I sort of set the pace for that. I listen, they talk. I give.

    if you ever want to talk about whats happened in the last 12 months, or what happened 12 months ago, people are here to listen. Please do keep holding on.
     
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