I've been back and forth and back and forth about it. But the pain has just been too much. I've tried to stay positive. And I never thought I'd turn to this option. But too many things happened to me at once and I am unable to handle this any more. I can't go on living my life feeling like this. I've never felt so low. The one person who I need through all this crap doesn't want anything to do with me and for no reason except he wants to be alone right now. selfish.