i think my gf has/is cheating...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by Iorek89, Feb 22, 2009.

  1. Iorek89

    Iorek89 Member

    there could be a few reasons for my asumption before hand
    1: exs have all cheated on me
    2: this gf has cheated on me before...

    but the story to my thoughts that shes doing it again is that i feel shes constantly lying to me about thinks for examp shes met other guys when claiming to be with mates. i dont know what shes done and the rest of this will explain why i feel shes cheated on me
    she talks to the other guys like she goes out with them and talks to me like crap its so hard to have a conversation with her shes either being really short or shes too busy talking to these other guys/guy... e.g on phone when were together or when shes around put her on msn and u wont hear a word from her again yet alone get her attention

    its come to breaking point for me where i almost hit her the other day (but its something i would never do) instead i punched a hole threw my door as she stood before me *ouch* but i dont think that even got my point across to her how much shes winding me up about this...shes wound me up that much that i feel like she just really doesnt care about me like she claims, ive ask her to stop and shes said she cant cause its who she is, but surely this is something stupid in my thoughts i dont ask her to stop talking to them or w.e i just ask her for some attention and to treat me like the bf i am and not like crap ...

    i ask her serious questions like why do u care/love me or wind me up like you do and she just doesnt reply to me it seems really bitchy/ignorant/arrogant and uncaring and its not questions u should avoid in my view...

    do i sound attention seeking or do i have the right to feel the way i do...
    im getting serious thoughts of ending relationship + contact because its winding me up that much
  2. andyc68

    andyc68 Guest

    to be honest mate it seems that you are wasting your time with her, from what you have said you already know she is playing you, so my advice is if you have had enough then dump her.
  3. ame solitaire

    ame solitaire Well-Known Member

    Relationships are a minefield-even when they arent complicated by infidelity/insecurity and trust issues.
    Its very hard to get trust back once it has been damaged.
    Sometimes people realise they are in a position of power-ie you want them more than they want you...and abuse that.
    Im allowing that myself currently...its soul destroying.But I know from personal experience that you wont leave till you are ready and so I wish you strength.x
  4. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    Seems like this relationship is doing more harm than good to you. So it's best you ditch her. You'll have less stress if you do.
  5. Iorek89

    Iorek89 Member

    the only problem is doing it ...
    i care too much and im too nice about things...
    and i think itd give her the satisfaction that she wants so that she can go off and do w.e
    which will/would hurt me, cause i know what would happen and its what i dont want to happen during the relationship cause of who / what it is...

    so confused :(:sad:
  6. Iorek89

    Iorek89 Member

    well i been trying to talk to her again n shes just been getting bitchy and now isnt talking to me...

    so think its decided?
  7. Anime-Zodiac

    Anime-Zodiac Well-Known Member

    In the end of the day it's your call. One approach might be to just have a casual relationship but that means having that mentality as well.
    Trying to talk to her is an good idea, it's just too bad for you she's not talking to you now.
  8. flayflow

    flayflow Well-Known Member

    the reason im not talking to him now is because he's hurling abuse at me so do u really think im going to reply!?!?
    you really dont understand about giving me my space do you... your not going to give me my time
    so if uv decided on what your going to do...
    act on it
  9. ame solitaire

    ame solitaire Well-Known Member

    My apologies,I didnt realise you were a member here or I wouldnt have commented at all.:eek:hmy:
  10. Iorek89

    Iorek89 Member

    take it to the world why dont u... ¬_¬

    ur space is ignorance and uncaring u dont even reply back and if u do its telling me where to go
  11. kenny

    kenny Well-Known Member

    In fairness, you joined here to snoop on her it seems. I'm guessing you posted this thread to get a reaction.

    Again, you don't seem to have any acknowledgement that she has feelings too.

    What worries me is that you punched a door beside her. That is still violence towards her - it's intimidatory, and must have caused her fright. There is no excuse for it. Get yourself some help for the anger as i think this is the key area where things are bad. If you're exploding all the time, she won't even try to talk to you.
  12. SpencerA

    SpencerA Well-Known Member

    this won't help either of you guys, give eachother some space, if this was originally your girls safe place you shouldn't have posted on here.. but if you're looking for support also then that's fine just keep yourselves separate from one another xxxx
  13. Iorek89

    Iorek89 Member

    i joined here for the same reason she did, to get an outside view on situations...
    as it is the acting out in violence is just a burst of energy i had to her not talking i try to talk normally sensibly and i can only get bitchy comments replies or even none at all
  14. Iorek89

    Iorek89 Member

    i joined here for the same reason she did, to get an outside view on situations...
    as it is the acting out in violence is just a burst of energy i had to her not talking i try to talk normally sensibly and i can only get bitchy comments replies or even none at all

    i never planned for her to get involved in the thread altho i shouldve known she would've... but all im asking for is a view on things not for a WWW brawl ...
  15. ame solitaire

    ame solitaire Well-Known Member

    Its hard when you are both on the same forum and things go wrong.I left a forum I posted on daily 2 weeks ago when I was dumped.I might have got a lot of support there but my g/f also posts/reads there...I didnt want to hurt her as I love her very much.She is a very private person and hates anyone knowing her/our business-whereas Im very open and like to talk/share-or used to.
    Im guessing what Im trying to say is-If you want to work things out ever,even just to be friends...try not to humiliate each other publicly too much.Strength to you both.xx
  16. flayflow

    flayflow Well-Known Member

    you sent me the link in facebook
    i would have known otherwise
    i dont mind that he's posting here cuz everyone needs someone to talk to right?
    i mean i post here about our problems then y shouldn't he.
    but the only think i do ask is that you dont read any of my posts or if u do then fine but we've had this conversation in the car.
    your very welcome to post here
    but just dont post on any of my threads

  17. LastCrusade

    LastCrusade Well-Known Member

    it takes two parties to makes a relationship successful. If either one is unwilling to give in, i think the relationship is heading for doom. Perhaps both should hear out each other's grievances and come to a compromise. A relationship without any compromise from either party won't last for long. If both of you think the relationship is worth salvaging, then hear each other out. If not, both of you should walk and also not continue to wash linen in the public.
  18. Iorek89

    Iorek89 Member

    if i never read what u put on here in the first place i wouldnt have known so as much as i do now about u and the things youve kept from me like thinking ur pregnant twice and how many different problems youve had in our relationship as well as trying to see what other people think of what ur new relationships gunna be like when you cant even get things straight to say to me everything u say to me when i look at things u put on here it just turns out u were lying to me
  19. kenny

    kenny Well-Known Member

    You shouldn't be doing this in public. It's a low blow. You *know* she's a member here, so why post it, unless it's to humiliate.

    Some things are NOT for the public domain, and relationship spats are one of them.
  20. antmiles

    antmiles Member

    Relationships needn't be hard. Me and my girlfriend to whom I was living with an engaged to just ended because, despite how deep in love we were, it was hard. We had a lot of strain and it was heart breaking and awful and actually made me want to end my life, but it was for the best. I'm coping ok at the minute and she has a new boyfriend already, but we're friends and I can forgive her and she forgives me for the way I was (anger issues) but we accept that our love wasn't enough, and it's time to move on. Sometimes it's for the best.