For those of you who saw me post on the positive forum about how I met a nice girl who gave me her phone number last Saturday... things haven't gone as well as planned. Either I'm misreading her numbers (which are a bit scribbled) or she gave me a bum number. I dialed it and it doesn't exist. If she didn't want to give me her number, I wish she'd just said "no". I must've been insane to think that a cute girl would give me her real phone number. She has eyes and she could see what a freak I am. I must've been crazy. Last Friday night, before I met her, I looked into the mirror for fifteen minutes before going to bed saying "I hate you, I hate you" over and over. I was hoping I was getting away from that. But I'm not. I hate this sloppy mass of cells that looks back at me in the mirror. I hate my curly hair and pudgy body. I hate my depression and insecurities. I hate that every girl I've ever tried to show affection for has run away. Not that I blame them. Who could possibly care for me? I'm nothing. I hate, I hate, I hate, I hate, I hate, I hate that stupid face that looks back at me in the mirror! I wish it would go away!!!!!