i think this is goodbye

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Landlocked blues, Mar 14, 2010.

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  1. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    i cant handle this any longer. resisting is to hard now. i just want to slip away unnoticed. i dont know. maybe this is a cry for help. i dont know. i dont know anything anymore.
     
  2. bringer of light

    bringer of light Well-Known Member

    If suicide was that easy I would have been dead 10 years ago.

    Although, I sometimes feel like giving up, I am glad I still exist. I am like a ghost that haunts my enemies dreams. They know I still exist and I will probably be the last thing they see before they enter my land.

    Let me be frank about this. Your option is to die unknown and insignifact or take the enemy to hell with you and become a legend that young men and women will asspire to?

    I know which I would choose. Pain is only a temporary sensation than anyone can overcome.
     
  3. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    dying unknown and insignificant is easier and better for everyone. that way no one gets hurt.
     
  4. bringer of light

    bringer of light Well-Known Member

    Better for your enemies. Think about yourself.
     
  5. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    You've come this far, why give up now?

    Problems can be solved. Anything that's troubling you can be dealt with. Stay calm and keep talking OK? Is there anything in particular that's making you feel low right now? Maybe we can help find solutions to your problem.

    Life is worth living even though it's hard sometimes.
     
  6. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    i cant say this without it sounding silly and childish but oh well.
    i just think everyone hates me. no one wants to be mates. even my mates hardly ever talk to me when i feel like this. its like im an outcast. not worth the hassle. im a waste of space.
     
  7. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    I've felt like that as well very often. But many times I found out later that I had more people in my surroundings who cared than I realized. Sometimes it's hard to see, I guess.

    Btw, by by checking out your stats on your profile I saw that you're bipolar... Did you know that Stephen Fry is also bipolar? You know, that guy who presents QI?
     
  8. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    i did know that yes. its nice to know someone who i would say has a "perfect" life, understands and is going through the same.

    as for my friends. they dont care. we had a massive fight last night. they dont uinderstand. and its fine i dont expect them to. but maybe at least try??!
     
  9. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    Maybe they don't know what to say to make you feel better? Or how to handle it? But yeah, if they kind of shun you whenever you're a bit down...then that's not very cool.

    But you're worth the hassle. When people don't see that it's their loss.
     
  10. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    Did you also see Stephen Fry's documentary about bipolar? It was very interesting to see. I think it's on YouTube and it's called "The secret life of the manic depressive". Definately worth a watch.
     
  11. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    if i had to say "its their loss" every-time, id had no friends. im always the one to make the effort. i just want to crawl into a hole and die right now. i am so low. lower than iv felt in a long time. i cant take it anymore!
     
  12. anony

    anony Member

    I just wanted to say that I know that feeling very well. Everyone hating me and not wanting to be friends. I think this is created by the low self-esteem. If you were to get in a different state of mind, maybe you wouldn't feel that way anymore. Other people pick up on low self-esteem and depression and take advantage or stay away from it. Other than trying to change your state of mind(through therapy or something), I'd suggest looking for better friends, I know there are people out there who'd love to be friends with you. There's a lot of worthless people in the world though and a few really good ones.
     
  13. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    i know your right but i just dont have the energy anymore. im so exausted from trying.
     
  14. anony

    anony Member

    Do you ever try meditating? Maybe if you could sit alone and clear your mind, you would come across some inspiration within yourself, a reason to keep going. I think if anything, doing something like that would give some renewed mental energy.
     
  15. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    i wouldnt even know where to start. is this a silly question but what do you think about when meditating? im willing to try
     
  16. anony

    anony Member

    To be honest, I've never successfully done it. It's something I've always been interested in but never actually found a quiet place to try it.

    The idea is to clear your mind completely. It's suppose to, I believe, bypass our thinking consciousness and reach a deeper state of our mind.
    To find relaxation, awareness, etc.

    Edit: I've spoken to a lot of people though who have gained a lot of benefit from it. I think being at the edge of life and death is probably the best time to give something like that a shot. Maybe even if you don't reach a deeper state of consciousness, you'll think of something important.
     
  17. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    hmm google, me thinks! thank you.
     
  18. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    I agree, anony. When I was feeling low, people stayed out of my way more. But when my depression lifted that happened less. My guess is that I came across as being more approachable when I felt better.

    @ sam: It's OK to feel the way you do. It's only understandable. I've felt like you do many, many times. But I held on. And things got better. I'm glad I never gave up. Neither should you. Things can turn around. You only have to approach things the right way. I agree with anony when he/she says many people would love to spend time with you. It's just that you have to have the luck to run into them.

    Do you meet many people with common interests? I make music and through that I've met quite a few kindered spirits. You could take, for instance, a painting course. Chances are you'd meet people who think alike.
     
  19. Sapphire

    Sapphire Well-Known Member

    Yeah, many people speak highly of meditation. I do that too very often; to just sit alone, close my eyes and let my mind wander. Often I get some good ideas during those moments. I don't do any official form of meditation, though.
     
  20. Landlocked blues

    Landlocked blues Well-Known Member

    iv never really had the confidence to take a course in my hobbies. i do it for my eyes only. and i havnt painted for so long. my mind is blank as of late. :sad: the closest iv come so far to meeting alike people is my depression group which starts on tues. im a total loser
     
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