I don't wanna do this anymore, but who knows my emotions change so fast these past few days, in a couple of hours I might be completely fine. I'm just so sick of my eating disorder controling me I have no one to talk to, no one understands. "just eat" they say. I can't eat, its so hard, and every time I force myself to I feel sick. I've tried therapy it doesn't work, I'm never gonna get better, I feel like I'll be stuck this way the rest of my life and I don't want to live like this. Either way I'm gonna die, my eating disorders gonna kill me or I'm gonna kill me. I don't see a reason to try.