I've been depressed in the past and I've suffered with anxiety 10 years. I've never felt this bad though. I don't really know why I'm posting because I'm a bit of a negative person and I just expect typical answers like 'you have so much to live for' etc. My medication has a lot to do with all of this. I was taking seroxat, I reduced it, I changed it, I went back on it, I increased it, I've gone back to what I was doing before all of this but still I feel worse than ever. I'm sitting here alone. XXXXXXXX't happen like that anymore. I wish I was simple and happy like I presume I was 28 years ago. I don't have anymore sleeping pills, which is probably some kind of 'saviour' right now. But there are things everywhere, glass, blades, razors etc. I just wish somebody would take it all away. Just random writing from my brain. I feel so bad. I feel stupid because I'm too old for this. People on here and on other places or on tv etc are mostly young and have bad parents etc. I'm almost 30 and still I feel so bad.