I thought I was doing fine - I stopped therapy, I've been on Effexor for two months now, with my doc slowly increasing the dosage. However, I am not sure if it was due to the immense amount of stress I've been undergoing the past three weeks, but I had a meltdown last week. I almost cut myself again but I decided to drink instead. I haven't had a drink or cut since I got hospitalized in early March, but I am terrified, absolutely terrified of hurting myself again. I'm spiraling down into this depression again, I can feel it and I don't know what to do. I don't want to go back to therapy. If anyone else has been in this boat, how did you deal with it? Is it just a "phase" that I will eventually get over, or is this more serious than I think?