After spending yesterday working from home I decided to go back to work today, and overall it was a pretty good day. Stayed busy and kept my thoughts at bay. I've been home for about an hour and my house is quiet, and empty. And why I am trying to keep myself distracted with music, and computer games and such, waiting for the wife to return home from work, the same thoughts that I've been having are creeping back in. The urge to cut has been very strong lately and yesterday i caved to the urge and I'm trying not to now. But I want to. I want to zoo freaking bad it hurts that I'm fighting it…. I'm sitting here in a panic, worried that I'll lose the fight without myself once again, that I'll mess up and cause real damage….