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I thought you were harmless.

Discussion in 'Rape and Abuse' started by Beka, Feb 19, 2012.

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  1. Beka

    Beka Well-Known Member

    I thought you were completely harmless.
    I thought if anything happened that I didn't like I could easily stop it.
    I was wrong on both counts.

    The first time your hand came around the back of my neck I started to freak in my mind but I thought nothing of it, Then your hand came back to my throat and you just started to squeeze it. I nearly cried and my throat still hurts a bit now. You told me to beg, beg for what exactly? I was completely confused by this act, yet I still carried on having sex with you.

    Can definitely say this is not how I pictured losing my virginity.
    Don't talk to me again. Don't look at me again. If you ever try to touch me again I will hurt you.

    At least that's what I would love to say, and mean it, but I find myself forgiving you because my mind is yet again, telling me it's my fault. The same lines over and over
    'Why didn't you stop it?' 'Why are you making a big deal out of it?' 'It is your fault'

    Why in the hell do I want to go crawling back to you.
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    when one is abused hun it is so hard to stop letting people abuse them again and again YOU are not in the wrong okay no way and if you can get away now hun before his acts become more violent go to get help now okay shelter whatever He will not change all he will think of is himself never you never so leave now while you can hugs
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