I wrote down a list of truths about my fears. How some of the things that I fear I can't control, and I need to accept that. And how other things are just a matter of me percieving them in a bad way when they're really not. And lastly, how I can't get everything that I want and that some things I want are unfair to other people. I am also doing my best to compromise and recognize the things that I do wrong in my relationship due to my intense emotions and try to fix them. I made another list of the things I need to change, and then asked my fiance to think of some things that he can do to make me feel better too. This way we are both acknowleging each others' needs. I really try my best to help myself...but it becomes difficult when you have to do it mostly by yourself. I don't know...I feel like I need some drugs.