I tried...and failed. again.

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by RedTears, Apr 27, 2010.

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  1. RedTears

    RedTears Well-Known Member

    I o.d. yesterday, and it wasn't too pleasant. It all came up a few hours later. I basically spent 2 hours drifting in and out of consciousness while puking my brains out. Fun, fun.

    I did it on impulse, but I had been planning this attempt for a while. THat's why I bought all the necessary things and researched info, ect. Normally it takes 72 hours to die with it in my system, but since i couldn't keep it down, thus i am still living. Fark.

    I told a friend today, and they were surprised that I acted like nothing was wrong the night before (i had seen her after o.d.). I don't mean to hurt my friends, but why should I have to suffer in order for everyone else to be happy and not mourn?
     
  2. shamps

    shamps Well-Known Member

    Sounds like you could do with some support hun.Been where you are now a long time ago and no it aint fun.Whilst it is wrong for other people to expect you to behave in a certain way just so they can sleep at night is wrong,you also have to understand that there are lots of ways to get through this.And youve already found one of them....here.Good choice.

    Could you not see your doc or a therapist to talk things through with hun?Are you on any meds if you dont mind me asking?Please dont think about hurting yourself again,people will care whether you think so or not.

    We care here so you can chat to any of us or feel free to send me a pm if you want to do it in private.Just please dont hurt yourself again,you wont feel the benefit because you wont be here as somebody said to me and its true.

    *hugs*
     
  3. Sadeyes

    Sadeyes Staff Alumni

    Hi RedTears...sometimes we do things impulsively because no one has heard us...please know we are here to support you and yes, you are valued and will be heard...try to stay safe and please let us know how you are doing...big hugs, J
     
  4. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I am glad you are still here Hope you get the help you need go in and talk to your doctor okay get some help for you
     
  5. Tobes

    Tobes Well-Known Member

    This is an excellent question, and one I don't immediately have an answer to. My best guess is that while you shouldn't have to suffer, you should keep living long enough to stop suffering. I don't know how long that will take, as I have been suffering for 14 years and counting (maybe more), but I know it will come to an end eventually, and it will for you too.

    How many avenues have you tried to stop your suffering? Doctors? Therapists? Friends? Even a new job or way of living can help immediately. Don't give up, things will get better for you, and you will look back and be thankful that you weren't beaten.
     
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