i tried

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by shuddertothink, Sep 4, 2010.

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  1. shuddertothink

    shuddertothink Well-Known Member

    i tried to get out and be sociable to try and get my mind off things, my friend mary invited me over to have a drink so i went against my better judgement, but that was a big mistake, cause now after 10 shots and constant fighting between her and her hubby i now feel worse. i even tried talking to my aunt since she is the only family member still in my life, but no, it didnt help. the truth is im tired. people tell me to keep fighting but thats all i have ever done, im sick of it, and i have nothing left to fight for. so whats the friggin point?
    the only reason i post in here is because maybe someone else here knows how im feeling, or at least partially understands. i cant take this anymore, im not strong enough.
     
  2. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Drinking alcohol brings on the depression so it is alcohol making yu feel so much worse okay. Time to go home and have warm bath and sleep tonight okay let the thought just go now okay as your mind is to clouded with boose to think any good way. I hope you stay safe.
     
  3. shuddertothink

    shuddertothink Well-Known Member

    you're probably right. I just thought it might make me feel better, something mood altering you know? funny thing is, i did try to get some sleep, but i wasn't able to rest, and i dont feel any better today. i did some thinking, and i noticed im isolating, so its probably making things worse. but what do you do when you have to stay away from everyone you know because they are all junkies, for west virginia Clarksburg has the highest drug problem, at least 80% of the people here use or deal. Its bad. so thats why im isolating. dealing with all my shit sober, is really hard on me, so i know if i start going out more i am gonna get sucked in to all of that again.
     
  4. Akita

    Akita Well-Known Member

    Wow, I didn't think I'd find someone else from Clarksburg WV here. I know what you're talking about. I see very suspicious activity all the time and I know it has something to do with drugs. It's gotten so bad that I just stay inside most of the day.
     
  5. shuddertothink

    shuddertothink Well-Known Member

    Clarksburg blows doesn't it? I regret moving here. I stay inside most of the time now too, i have to.
     
  6. Akita

    Akita Well-Known Member

    Yeah, it does. Was there a reason you moved here?
     
  7. shuddertothink

    shuddertothink Well-Known Member

    Yeah i came here cause a friend died, and i went to the funural, so after being talked into staying a couiple weeks i kinda got stranded. So since they closed the greyhound station down, and i didnt have a vehicle, i had no choice but to get an apartment.
     
  8. Akita

    Akita Well-Known Member

    I'm sorry. :(
     
  9. shuddertothink

    shuddertothink Well-Known Member

    s'ok thats life i guess
     
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