I use to believe that we were all put onto this earth for a reason. I just don't have a purpose. I always thought my purpose was to help others, yet, I can't even help myself. I've been slowly drowning for the past 7 years. And I just honestly cannot take it anymore. It's in and out of this deep-holed depression where I just literally do no want to do a thing. Nothing makes me happy anymore, because I know as soon as I start to get happy it will all just come crashing down again. My favorite quote lately has been "things have to get worse before they get better" but what if things are ALWAYS getting worse and never better? I always tell people that God never gives us what we can't handle. But I cannot handle this anymore. Everytime I get somewhat upset I get the "oh have you been taking your meds?" I take my medicine everyday but it doesn't make things better. Everybody knows how much I just want to do it. But, nobody helps. And I'm certainly not going to help myself. Nobody cares, so why should I? On another note. It's been about two months since I cut myself, well, after tonight, 0.