Even tho i have been talked out of committing suicide more times than i can count but i still think about it -- i'll be fine and go to the store and walk by something a have the worst thoughts, like i walk into the cooking isle and see the knives and think what i could do w/ one. Even tho I haven't OD in a while i still think bout it -- Worst of all i still think about my plan, where and when and how.... Sometimes Id like to hide away somewhere and lock the door -- sometimes all i wanna do is take a mixed OD, take my knives - get in the car and leave this hell hole called earth. I just wanna take my life now before i change my mind. I WANT TO DIE!!!! I KNOW WHATS GONNA HAPPEN ON JUNE 23 - I DONT WANNA DEAL WITH IT - I WANNA TAKE MY LIFE SO FREAKING BADLY!!!!!!