Hey all, Junior Year starts tomorrow, and im feeling like total shit. to me, going back to school just means constant reminders of my inability to approach a girl. Not just get shy, but i mean i have never had a girlfriend, and im 17. I may be young, but all my friends have had some form of a relationship, but im not (just) looking for sex. Theres a girl i would die for, shes the nicest person ive ever met and also one of the prettiest. Shes also one of the only girls to accept me as i am, a shy, relatively outgoing person, right off the bat. I finally worked up the courage to start routinely having lunch together on a regular basis, getting to know each other and getting to know her friends, too. They are all really nice people, which is refreshing, since high school is full of assholes. So at this point we're pretty friendly, (this happened last year, by the way) and i was thinking i might be able to ask her out without it being weird. Naturally, the next thing i see on the way home from school that day is her and another guy holding hands, walking together. The next day, they announce they are goin out, and are still going strong. Now, dont get me wrong, I am happy for her as long as shes's happy, but this was the first time in my life that I actually had the balls to make the first move and try and get to know her. And it worked, too! until the day i start planning to ask her out, someone gets there first. Normally, I would sit on my ass and think: "oh my god, shes so beautiful, if only I could talk to her." but this time i actually did it, and almost immediately after, another guy got there first! Now, this may not seem like much of a reason to contemplate suicide, but this combined with my dad's pressure to do well (which just stresses me out even more so i do worse), my parents constantly fighting, then taking their anger out on me, all adds up to shitty day after shitty day. If this is life, I want no part in it.