First off I wish I found this forum years ago. I had no idea I'm not alone in this. I've been diagnosed with PTSD as a result of domestic violence in my childhood. I feel like I've gotten over it, except for the grudge that I still carry against the man who beat me. Has anyone on this board ever taken violent revenge against an abuser, and did it help? Emotionally I think that it would be immensely satisfying to beat the crap out of this man. Not kill him, but to show that kids become adults and if you abuse kids, you get to deal with what they grow up to become. I also hope/wish that doing so would resolve the lack of self esteem that has followed me well beyond the nightmares and flashbacks. Yet obviously because this is an emotional issue for me I have no idea if I'm thinking clearly or jumping to the conclusion that justifies my impulses. I want revenge but have doubts that the solution to violence should be more violence.